


I'm Sure

by heckinshutup



Category: Victorious
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Crushes, Eventual Relationships, F/F, Jade cares, Romance, Tori notices
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-13
Updated: 2018-03-28
Packaged: 2019-03-30 23:14:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13962165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heckinshutup/pseuds/heckinshutup
Summary: “I see more love and care in your eyes in one moment than I do in any boyfriend I’ve ever had, no matter how long we were in a relationship. I only see the emotions in your eyes when you look at me. If you look at Beck, Cat, or anyone else, your eyes are as stone cold as they were when we first met.” I shuffled closer to the girl in front of me, but halted when she took a slight step back.





	1. You

**Author's Note:**

> I've had this idea in my head for a while, I just didn't know what ship to put it to. Guess I found it. Hope you guys enjoy!

“You alright, Vega?” I felt a comforting hand on my shoulder

“Huh? Oh, yeah,” I replied softly.

“You look off, you sure?” I turned to what I really didn’t want to see; the most beautiful blue eyes that were filled with care, something rare to see in them. Well, at least to everyone besides me.

“Yes, Jade, I’m sure. I just stayed up all night studying.” That wasn’t a complete lie. I mean, I did stay up all night, but it wasn’t from studying.

“That’s a lie.” I cringed at her words. She saw right through me, almost like she knew exactly what I was thinking.

“Jade, c’mon, I’m not up to this right now, I’ll tell you later. See ya,” I muttered as I packed up my books and walked out of the room. I pulled out my phone and texted my best friend Cat.

**We need to talk, meet me at my locker?**

I didn’t have to wait long for a reply, because once i put down my phone to open my locker, it buzzed.

**Yeah sure see u there xo**

I smiled softly. Cat was always there for me to talk to. I stood at my locker for about two minutes before I spotted her red hair.

“Hey, you alright?” Cat asked.

“No, follow me.” I lead her to the nearest restroom. I checked to see if anyone was hiding in the stalls and turned to her. “So, you know how I like Jade and-”

“Yes, Tori, you want me to find out if she likes you. You’ve told me this multiple times in the past few days.”

“I’m sorry, it’s just I can’t concentrate without knowing. I’ve lost so much sleep this year because I can’t stop thinking about her.” I crossed my arms and stared at my reflection in a mirror.

“Well then, I guess you’ll be happy with the info I’ve gathered.” Cat smiled brightly. She pulled out her phone and showed me her texts with Jade.

**C: Hey Jade?**

**J: what is it red**  
**C: I see the way u look at Tori**

**J: whats ur point**

**C: Do u like her?**

**J: alright, dont tell her, okay? Yes i like her so what? i doubt shell like me**

**C: Okay thanks xo**

**J: whyd u wanna know**

**C: Just curious :P**

**J: kk red**

I held back the squeal that bubbled in my throat. I grinned and thanked Cat. The bell to start the next period hadn’t rung yet, so I started my search for Jade. It didn’t take long before I spotted her iconic black hair with blue tips. I called her name from across the hall. She turned around with a scowl, expecting that I was some random chick she had probably slept with. That thought made me hesitate in motioning her over. I had a crush on the biggest player at Hollywood Arts. Jade was known as the smash and trash queen. I felt my stomach turn to butterflies as she smirked and walked towards me.

“Whatcha need, Vega?”

“I wanna talk,” I said before biting my lip. Jade arched her pierced eyebrow.

“You sure? It’s only been like ten minutes since you said you didn’t wanna talk about it and then left.” I looked into her eyes. A mixture of worry and care, something rare for her, made me grab her hand and lead her into an empty classroom. “Tori? What’s going o-”

“You care for me,” I blurted out.

“W-what?” Jade asked, shocked. She stared at me with wide eyes and eyebrows raised.

“I see more love and care in your eyes in one moment than I do in any boyfriend I’ve ever had, no matter how long we were in a relationship. I only see the emotions in your eyes when you look at me. If you look at Beck, Cat, or anyone else, your eyes are as stone cold as they were when we first met.” I shuffled closer to the girl in front of me, but halted when she took a slight step back.

“I don’t understand what you-”

“I like you!” I cut her off with a shout. She fell back and landed in an empty desk. “I like you,” i repeated softly, “and Cat showed me your text conversation, which is why I’m actually telling you this. You help me through so much, despite pretending that we’re frenemies, and I feel like I was just a trophy to those boys. They just paraded me around to their friends and it disgusted me!” I could feel my voice crack as my vision grew blurry with tears. Jade focused on the ground. I heard a soft sniff and a single spot on the carpet became dark.

“Tori,” she whispered, “are you sure?” Jade looked up at me, her watery blue eyes showed an obvious plea.

“Why wouldn’t I be? If I wasn’t sure, we wouldn’t even be here right now, Jade!”

“I don’t think you’re completely sure. Listen, I want you to think. I want you to take a week and think about your decision, make sure this is what you want. I might be better than those other guys, but not by much. I’m a terrible person, you know this. I’m selfish and a jerk and just terrible. You deserve better, which is why I want you to think. I’ll see you in a week, okay?”

Jade walked out of the room without looking back. I leaned my back against the wall and sighed. “At least she likes me,” I murmured. “She just wants me to think. That’ll be easy, right?” I stared at the closed door. “Yeah, this’ll be easy.”


	2. Actually

That night, while I was in my room, I shoved thoughts of Jade out of my head to concentrate on my homework. At least I tried to. Thoughts of what Jade said lingered in my mind. 

 

_ ‘ _ _ I might be better than those other guys, but not by much.’ _

 

_ ‘I’m selfish and a jerk and just terrible.’ _

 

_ ‘You deserve better.’ _

 

Did I really deserve better than her? How can I deserve better if she’s the best I’ve ever known? I decided to try and get some answers.

 

**Me: Hey, I’d like to ask a question on what you said. Wanna talk?**

 

**Jade: dont**

 

**Me: Don’t what?**

 

**Jade: dont talk to me**

 

My stomach dropped. She didn’t want to talk to me. Why doesn’t she want to talk to me? I decided, instead of asking her, to drop it and move on with the night. Jade, surprisingly, was very active on a group chat we had with our friends, despite her ignoring me. She and Beck were arguing over which songs from a band were better. Seeing Beck chat with her gave me an idea. I brought up a private text thread with him.

 

**Me: Hey, Beck? Can I ask you something? It’s abt Jade…**

 

**Beck: yeah bro whats up?**

 

**Me: So, you know I like her, right?**

 

**Beck: youre not very subtle abt it tor**

 

**Me: Crap, really?**

 

**Beck: everyone sees the way you look at her, youre the heart eyes emoji in person**

 

**Me: Oh geez**

 

**Beck: its aight tor, she looks at you the same way ;)**

 

**Me: I know, I told her I like her today…**

 

**Beck: really? what happened?**

 

**Me: She told me to wait a week and be sure that I want her…**

 

**Beck: thats… surprising. jade isnt really one to wait for something she wants if she knows the something wants her**

 

**Me: So, does that mean she doesn’t want me?**

 

**Beck: uhm**

 

**Beck: NO!!**

 

**Me: Then what does it mean, Beck?**

 

**Beck: she NEEDS you**

 

**Me: What?**

 

**Beck: she cant live without you and she wants you to feel the same. she wants you to be 100% sure that she isnt just a crush for you. jade isnt one to feel much, but when she does she gives all and more. dude you dont know what u got**

 

**Me: I think I do, Beck.**

 

**Beck: oh yeah? y do u like her?**

 

**Me: I**

 

**Me: I don’t know**

 

**Me: I just feel a pull towards her, you know? She just makes me feel special. I mean, you guys make me feel special, but she’s different. She makes me feel more wanted and loved than even my parents make me feel, and that just makes me feel really happy. And when I think abt her I get butterflies and, according to Cat and Andre, I blush real bad. And when I think about a future with her, I malfunction in a good way. Why do you think I haven’t been doing as well on tests? Because I think of her and having kids with her and ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhh**

 

**Beck: wow**

 

**Beck: look, ill talk to u more abt it later, its late and i like sleep soooooooo gn**

 

**Me: Thanks for listening. Goodnight**

 

I tossed my phone across the bed, taking a slight comfort in the soft thump of the phone hitting the soft mattress. Beck was easy to talk to, but a part of me worried he was going to send screenshots of the things I said to Jade. “Whatever,” I thought to myself, “she already knows i like her, why should this change anything?” I picked my phone up and scrolled through my contacts. I saw the last message sent on the text thread Jade and I were on. Why did she say she didn’t want me to talk to her when I texted her? I swallowed the lump in my throat and started typing.

 

**Me: Why not?**

 

A check mark appeared next to my message, showing that Jade had read what I sent. My stomach dropped as the three dots that symbolized she was typing popped up. I panicked and turned my phone off. Without looking at the new notification, I plugged my phone in to charge and turned towards my window. I grinned at the moon which was almost centered in my window. I fell asleep right after muttering, “I bet Jade’s looking at the moon right now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Characters (*cough* Jade *cough*) might be a ~little~ ooc, but her being a bitch doesnt really match with how i wanna take this story. anyway, hope you guys enjoyed! criticism is always appreciated!


	3. Care

_ “Vega,” a soft whisper broke the dark silence, “why are you here?” Hands brushed hair out of my face, finally showing me who I was talking to. Butterflies erupted in my stomach at the sight of her blue eyes and pale skin, which was perfectly framed by black hair tipped with royal blue.  _

 

_ “I couldn’t wait for you,” I whispered against her lips. Her hands landed on my waist, softly rubbing circles along my skin. I quickly leaned in, closing the distance between us. Her lips were soft and warm, unlike any boy I’ve ever kissed. I grinned against her and pulled away.  Her blue eyes scanned my face for any signs of regret or disappointment. Once she realized I wanted more, she sighed and kissed me again. I felt her turn and I was suddenly pushed onto the bed. She smirked and crawled towards me. I sat speechless as she slowly took her shirt off. The shirt brushed past her stomach and was just about to reveal her bra. I gulped and looked into her eyes which sparkled with mischief. _

 

Sunlight streamed through the window. I tried to fall back asleep to continue the dream, but my phone kept buzzing from notifications. I groaned and opened my eyes. I looked at the clock by my bed and groaned again when I saw that it was 10 in the morning. Thank God for the weekend, right? I snatched my phone out of its charger and shuffled to the bathroom. Last night, between talking to Beck and worrying about Jade, my friends and I made a plan to get lunch at Nozu’s and go hang out at the mall. I glanced at my notifications and felt my stomach drop. I completely forgot Jade texted back. I opened her message and gulped.

 

**Jade: i dont want your decision to be swayed**

 

I furrowed my eyebrows. What did she mean by that? How can my decision be swayed? I made a mental note to ask her about it later today and got ready. After a hot shower and half an hour in front of the mirror, I was ready for the day. I scrolled through the group chat to check who was picking me up.

 

**Andre: Okay, so I will pick up Robbie, Beck, and Cat. Since I have no more room in my car, Jade will have to pick up Tori. Sound good?**

 

Unfortunately, everyone agreed. Great, I was going to have to be in a car alone with Jade West. The thought alone sent butterflies throughout my body. I glanced again at the clock. 11:03, Jade was gonna be here any minute. I grabbed my purse, sprayed perfume on my neck, and rushed downstairs. The exact moment my feet hit the ground, the doorbell rang. I took one last look at myself, using my phone as a mirror, and opened the door. Jade stood awkwardly on the front porch. She looked up from the ground and smirked at me.

 

“Ready to go, Vega?” she asked. I nodded my head and followed her to her car. Her skinny jeans fit her legs perfectly and the grey flannel she wore draped her back like a cape fit for only the finest of queens. I gulped before opening the passenger-side door of her black Mercedes Benz. 

 

“So, uh, I wanna talk about something. It’s about the text you sent last night.” I folded my hands in my lap and glanced at her.

 

“Save it,” she snapped. I flinched and looked out the window. She sighed and tried to get my attention. “Look, I’m sorry, Tori. I didn’t mean to snap at you. Hell, it’s not my fault we’re both in this awkward situation where I have to drive you to Nozu’s. I’m sorry, Vega.”

 

“It’s not your fault, Jade,” I murmured, “I should’ve told Andre to pick me up and you grab Beck.” I looked at her and gave a weak smile.

 

“No, I should’ve said something like, ‘Oh, her house is too far away!’ or, ‘I need to talk to Beck about something, can I grab him instead?’ It’s my fault.” She stopped at the red light and looked back at me. “Let’s make this car ride count, all right?” I nodded and unfolded my hands. I leaned back in the car seat and sighed contently. “My car that comfortable, Vega?” she chuckled. 

 

“Yeah,” I sighed. She turned on the radio and let the music travel through the car. I tried my hardest to register this moment and log it in my brain. The smell of pine with a faint trace of smoke, almost like a forest fire, the music softly playing, and muttered curses from Jade as a driver forgot to use a turn signal filled my senses. 

 

Before long, we pulled up to a parking spot about a block from Nozu’s. We exited the car and started to walk towards the restaurant. Our comfortable silence was broken by the calls from our other four friends. They caught up to us and continued on with their conversation.

 

“No, dude, I’m telling you,” Beck said to Robbie, “Andre will totally beat Demi Lovato in his music career.”

 

“No way!” Robbie shouted. “Demi Lovato has been in the public eye since she was a kid!”

 

“Guys, can we stop talking about this?” Andre butted in. Jade, Cat, and I nodded our heads in agreement. We really didn’t want to hear the boys argue about something pointless. Robbie and Beck weighed their options before looking at each other. 

 

“Yeah,” Beck muttered, “I guess Robbie and I will continue this on our own time.” Robbie nodded his head and grinned. “So, sushi?” The six of us entered the restaurant and found a booth that would fit us. We conversed about school, teachers, and what stores we were planning on going in. Eventually, the tension grew between me and Jade. Even though we had a peaceful car ride together, we couldn’t pretend like everything was okay forever. I still needed to ask her about the text and she still needed to explain what she meant by it.

 

“Hey, Jade,” I piped up, “can I talk to you outside? In private?” I bit my bottom lip in anticipation of her answer.

 

“I’d rather not,” she stated without looking up from her sushi. I looked at Beck who just shrugged. I took a deep breath and spoke.

 

“Please, Jade? It’s important.” Jade looked at me and rolled her eyes.

 

“Fine, but only ‘cause I want to.” I smiled and exited the booth. As we made our way out of the restaurant, someone shouted.

 

“You’re whipped!” The voice sounded a lot like Beck. I chuckled and shook my head. Jade, on the other hand, looked about ready to turn around and yell at the boy.

 

“Don’t bother with him,” I whispered at her, “he’s just teasing.” She opened her mouth to protest, but closed it when I raised an eyebrow. Beck was right, she really was whipped. Once, we made it to the alleyway behind the restaurant, Jade spoke up.

 

“So, uh, what did you want to talk about?” Her hands were fidgety and she looked uncomfortable. No one has seen this side of Jade, and she didn’t want them to. She looked somewhat fragile, like she could be broken down by the wrong word. She only showed me this side, and maybe that’s why I fell for her. I wanted to hug her and end the stupid week she gave me, but I needed to talk to her.

 

“What did you mean by ‘I don’t want your decision being swayed’?” Her eyes showed an obvious struggle between two choices of her own.

 

“You asked me why I don’t want you talking to me and I answered. What more do you want?” I felt a rush of anger flow through me, but it went away as quickly as it came.

 

“I told you what I want, Jade. I want you…” My eyes widened before I quickly added on to the already spoken sentence. “T-to tell me what you meant by that text.” I bit my lip and looked at her. She didn’t notice the slip-up. Or maybe she did and just wasn’t showing it.

 

“It doesn’t take a genius to figure out what I meant by that, Vega.” I could tell Jade was getting irritated, but I could only feel emotions surging through my body. This was no time for rational thinking.

 

“Well then maybe I am an idiot!” I shouted. She jumped back slightly, obviously startled. 

 

“Wait, no you’re not.” She shuffled towards me and rested a hand on my shoulder. I yanked away from her touch, but deep down I missed the contact.

 

“According to what you say about people who ask you out, I am,” I muttered.

 

“But you’re different.” She tried again to touch me. This time, however, I didn’t pull away.

 

“Why? Why am I the exception? How am I so different?” I looked up at her, immediately wishing I hadn’t. Her eyes were rimmed with red and glistened from the threat of tears.

 

“Because I like you. You know that. Those other girls are just… well, they’re just idiots!” I let out a shaky laugh.

 

“Great use of vocabulary, Jade.” She sighed and looked away.

 

“What else do you want me to say? Morons? Dumbasses? Imbeciles?”

 

“What’s your point?”

 

“I could ask you the same thing.” Her eyes met mine again. This time, though they still revealed she was about to cry, they hardened just a tad.    
  


“Hey, look I-”

 

“No,” she cut me off. “This is exactly why I don’t want you talking to me. We’re fighting and it could change your answer. If we fight next week, who knows if you’ll be over it. You won’t have a clear mind, Vega.” I looked down and concentrated on what she said. She did have a point, I could easily be on cloud nine, or just be mad at her. I shook my head and raised my voice.

 

“I trust myself to make the right decision. I trust myself to be able to look past whatever temporary emotion I’ll be feeling at the time and decide what I believe will be the right choice for the both of us. I trust myself, so why don’t you?” My vision became blurry and I felt warm liquid slide down my cheek. Jade looked broken. She opened her mouth, but closed it. She then repeated the action for a few minutes.

 

“Look, Vega, I-”

 

“You what?”

 

“Will you let me finish?” I scowled and nodded my head at her to continue. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes.

 

“I trust you, Tori. I trust you completely. I just don’t trust myself.” She opened her eyes and smiled weakly. I stared back at her, confused.

 

“What do you mean?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's been forever, but here's another chapter! I really had to sit down and think about how I wanted to take this chapter. I hope you guys enjoyed it!


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